October 2, 2008

The Three-Month Beard Experiment
Periş (Mureş), Romania

I let my beard grow for a full month before giving it the first of several cleanups—Slovakia had the initial honors. Every week or so I'd clean up my neckline and trim down my whiskers so that they were generally even (keeping the unkempt mountain man look at bay). This lasted for about a month, until I hit September, when I quickly maxed out the length setting on the diminutive Wahl trimmer I purchased in Singapore.

So, for the last month, I've let the whiskers run free. When I adorn my sock hat, I feel like a cast member of Deadliest Catch—as if I should be plucking crab pots out of the Bering Sea in a fluorescent orange jumpsuit.

Random trivia: Popular wisdom holds that beards evolved as protection from the cold, but beards appear in the tropics, and the Alaskan Inuit cannot grow them. Some scientists now speculate that beards evolved as cooling devices, to whisk sweat off the faces of hunters.

There is truly nothing hard about doing something like this. All that's required of it in this lifestyle is patience, for there are no puzzled looks from office coworkers to ponder over, or societal limits to placate.

It should be a crime for a man to enter his thirties not having known what his face looks like without a razor's touch for weeks or months on end.

Why must sporting a full beard be thought of as one tattered outfit away from homeless bum or dirty hippie? The ancient Greeks regarded the beard as sign of virility, which it was a disgrace to be without. It wasn't until the time of Alexander the Great that smooth shaving became customary, as generals began urging their soldiers to shave (citing beards as convenient handholds for enemy soldiers, and that shaving distinguishes friendly soldiers from barbarian enemies).

Where's my chin?

Given all the "War on Terror" nonsense these days, bearded men truly have become the barbarians of our time.

…But much like the Greek soldiers learned, I too have discovered that a beard and infant do not mix. My nearly nine-month-old son has long since mastered the art of grabbing objects with his hands, and my beard has not been spared from his unmerciful grip. This alone has given me good reason to trim it back to a more battle-ready length. Besides, I've got a full enough face without all that hair making me look like I've got an even rounder one, or a double chin.

Trimmed back

So, off it went today. Three months of patience, reduced to setting 4.5 of 6 on my trimmer. I'm sure you'll agree that this was a good thing.

I tell Tatiana that I'm getting bored with long hair, and that thinking about shaving completely and cutting my hair off, perhaps back to a level that it was during my 2006 visit to Colombia. Naturally, she's not too thrilled with this idea (her preference on me is this length, or longer). We'll see.

…Maybe I should just go with the Miami moustache. :D

Comments:

The United States

babak

October 3rd, 2008

The stache is AWESOME. SCREAMS porn star, and you know i love it.

Rock out daddy

The United States

Katie

October 7th, 2008

I vote for 2006 hair…

The United States

Wade

October 9th, 2008

A man is only worth his mustache, a barbarian his beard.

The United States

Carrie

October 13th, 2008

I must admit the full bushy beard is a bit unsettling. I might have to agree with Katie's vote.

The United States

Dianne

October 22nd, 2008

I concur with Katie and Carrie…hope all is well!

The United States

Tyde Riopelle

November 14th, 2008

This is the last blogthat is visible on my computer. I was wondering if I am at the wrong page or something. Really enjoied your stories and can't wait for more.

Tyde

Romania

Craig | travelvice.com

November 14th, 2008

Tyde — Keep an eye out on September and beyond, we've finally landed somewhere with an Internet connection after being without for over a month. I'll be filling in the gaps soon. Thanks again for reading! The travelogue is certainly not dead (despite Aidric's best attempts) — it's still living and breathing offline on my laptop, waiting for me to caption photos and write some missing bits before uploading.

The United States

Craig Strong

November 26th, 2008

Hi Craig, glad to hear all is well and we'll be hearing more soon.

Have a beautiful day.

The United States

MB

November 28th, 2008

Glad to see things are still moving. Landed here a year ago (looking for info for a Peru trip (that turned into a Prague trip, natch)), and have been popping in ever since. Looking forward to more.

Note: Comments are open to everyone. To reduce spam and reward regular contributors, only submissions from first-time commenters and/or those containing hyperlinks are moderated, and will appear after approval. Hateful or off-topic remarks are subject to pruning. Your e-mail address will never be publicly disclosed or abused.